Since having kids, has sex felt numb, disconnected, or even painful for you? Did you have a traumatic or painful birth experience that you feel is affecting your sex life?
If so, you’re so not alone.
Many mama’s are completely unconscious of numbness, disconnection or sexual pain…
While others are conscious but are sucking it up because they have no one to talk to about it.
There are so few resources to help a women restore her sexual functioning after birth…
And even if you aren’t one of the 33% of women that experiences birth trauma,
you might very well be a victim of sexual abuse or you might have grown up with a lot of religious guilt and shame around your sexuality.
If any of these apply, you’re probably walking around with a very tense, stressed out, or even traumatized vagina.
Because, the vagina holds onto tension, stress, and trauma like a sponge does to water.
What many people don’t realize is that the postpartum period has a way of stirring up the pot and bringing up unhealed parts of us to the surface.
The point is to look at them, do something about them, and ultimately, become better mothers.
Divine design, if you ask me…
So, where do you turn for help?
First off, if you’re experiencing pain, it’s important to rule out any medical conditions you might not be aware of first with your doc.
If something is medically wrong, your doc should be able to help you or at least refer you to a pelvic floor physical therapist.
And, let me tell ya, they are amazing!
If you see one, you can expect an expert evaluation and for them to provide practices and exercises tailored specifically for your healing.
If you’ve experienced birth trauma of some sort, your doctor will probably refer you to a therapist.
But, there are very few therapists that have any experience with birth trauma and no one is going to refer you to anyone to deal with your religious guilt and shame around your sexuality.
And while many women who seek treatment from a therapist experience great results, others find talk therapy very inadequate because it only works on the level of the mind, not the body where the tension, stress, and trauma are stored.
Because to heal pain that’s sourced from tension, stress, and trauma, you have to heal the place where it’s stored (the body) too…
which is why yoga is such a big deal these days.
So, for the mama’s who find your doctor’s advice to “do kegels” or “use extra lube” very inadequate,
Because there’s nothing medically wrong with you and the therapy didn’t help…
What if I told you that there was a way to heal yourself from emotional trauma, tension, numbness, and pain with the touch of your trusting and caring partners’ hand?
In that case, today I want to tell you about an amazing practice that can have you feeling better than normal down there if the doctor or therapist didn’t help.
Having had the good fortune to study and learn about healing traditions from around the world…
One healing practice that can help you feel better than normal down there is called yoni massage, or pussy massage if you’re not familiar with the Sanskrit term “yoni.”
Yoni (pronounced yo-nee) simply means “source of life” or “sacred space.”
Yoni massage is intimate and sensual (not sexual) and works on the physical, emotional and mental levels to transform how you feel about yourself and your sexual well-being.
The great thing about this practice is that even though it’s super old and comes from the tantric tradition…
when taught in context for restoring postpartum sexual health and releasing tension, stress, and trauma in the vagina, the practice is totally relevant, adequate, and effective regardless of your spiritual or religious background.
Because yoni massage is a dedicated healing practice, if you’ve experienced a traumatic birth, sexual abuse, or religious guilt and shame, often, yoni massage will help you release sexual blockages and any association of your sexuality with the trauma.
But, it requires the good intention, presence, and communication of a willing and able giver (your partner), and trust, surrender, and detachment from any outcome from you, the receiver.
The practice starts with preparation of creating a romantic and sensual environment and inviting healing energies into the room.
Once you have done this you will start breathing together and eye gazing to connect the two of you at the heart level,
Then the giver will awaken your senses, and finally, massage around the vulva, inside the vagina and around the cervix.
This is a very vulnerable practice.
But, done with the trust of a skilled partner holding you and giving you space and time to release tension and trauma stored in your pelvis (just like when you receive a neck and shoulder massage but way deeper),
the more you do this practice, the more tension and emotional trauma will release allowing you to feel less numb and normal again.
In fact, you’ll probably feel better than normal…
If you’re interested in learning with your partner how to do yoni massage to release tension, stress, numbness, or trauma so you can feel normal again down there, I’ve got w-a-y more for you.
Simply email me at email@example.com and we’ll talk about how I can support you in that. (no worries, your privacy is totally protected when you email me).
With so much love,